GOD is SO Good!

The last 24 hours have been filled with nerves, prayers, tears, worry, and now relief!

My grandmother, the rock of our entire family, had an emergency MRI yesterday due to swelling of her optic nerve. She had been feeling dizzy for about a month as well. My mom (a nurse) has a way of calmly preparing me for the worst and she has never lied to me. She said very plainly, "worst case, this is a tumor".

Not wanting to panic too quickly, we went on about our day. We continued packing for the beach (we leave tomorrow :)) and my sis and I went to get pedicures. The hours dragged on and we found out that we would know the results today. Needless to say I didn't sleep and the only time my head was clear was during my workout (thank goodness for fitness). I prayed constantly, and I will admit, it was a very selfish prayer: "Lord, you can't take my grandma from me, you have to let her be ok". Not my finest Christian moment but I am thankful that the Lord knows my heart and knows what I meant to say.

Sitting in a meeting this morning around 9:30 I got the text from my mom "MRI is Normal!!!!!". Three simple words that put a goofy smile on my face. I almost cheered out loud but somehow contained my composure until later. Called  my mom after the meeting and she said they will give her Prednisone (sp?) eye drops and monitor the swelling. God is SO good, my Grandma is going to be ok!

I have mentioned my Papa numerous times in this blog, because for 13 years, he was my world. But for the past 18 (can't believe he has been gone that long), my grandma has carried this family. She was the one that wasn't as strong. She wasn't the one who spoke up for herself, she was the one who wouldn't make it without Papa. It's funny how God takes those misconceptions and shows you just what he can do! My Grandma's work wasn't done and still isn't done. She is the best Christian example I have and I am truly thankful today that we are not facing a serious medical condition that will take us from her! God really is SO GOOD!!

Me and Grandma on my wedding day :)

Garrett's Grad party

We rely on Grandma for literally everything

Katlyn's Graduation

My Fitness Journey - Weeks 3/4

I am much more positive writing this update than the last one.

As of this morning I have lost 3.3 lbs. And while that is not a huge amount, I can finally start to see progress!

I feel that I have been doing really well with temptation too! This past weekend was July 4th and any holiday with my family involves FOOD. But I packed a cooler filled with fruit, veggies, and grilled chicken and that is what I ate all weekend. I cooked a cake for July 4th/my uncles bday and had one teeny tiny sliver. I feel that one slice of cake every now and then is not going to kill me.

I took a new photo this week. I am not sure if I can see much difference in the picture, but I can feel the difference. I am able to breathe in my dress pants again and there are some clothes that I am able to zip now.

I still have a ways to go but seeing progress has me motivated. I CAN do this and I WILL!!!

Cauliflower Pizza

I think the worse thing to give up on this health food journey is pizza. I love it. There is nothing better than a lazy night of eating pizza (with brownies and wine but they have been easier to give up). So I started looking at cauliflower pizza crust. The pictures on Pinterest made it look so wonderful so I thought, I can do this!

I got the recipe here and it was fairly easy to follow. Except when I didn't :( I have a pizza stone and I used that instead of a metal baking pan. And wax paper instead of parchment paper (if anyone could tell me the difference that would be great). And I thought, because I was using a stone, that I wouldn't need to bake it first. I am not sure why I thought that, I just did. Well something from those three things made the difference because the crust was very doughy and we could not eat it like a pizza.

I will, however, be trying this again because like I said, it wasn't too terribly difficult and was actually fun to make!

Have any of you guys ever tried it? Do you know the key to getting the crust crispy?! I would LOVE to know! :)

My Fitness Journey...week 2

I am extremely discouraged as I am writing this...

After two weeks of minimal carbs and 45 min workouts 6 out of the 7 days...I am right where I was the last time I wrote this blog.

I know it takes time - but I really thought I would have lost at least a lb by now....here is what I have been doing the last 2 weeks:

* Treadmill for 3.5-4 miles 4/5 week days
* Insanity some nights when I feel up to it. Zumba or Insanity on Saturdays
* Eating the exact same thing almost every day:
   - Breakfast: 2 pieces of turkey sausage, 1 egg, 1 carton chocolate milk
   - Lunch: Grilled Chicken breast, fresh fruit, 1/2 Hershey bar with almonds
   - Snack: Apple slices with peanut butter or 1/2 bag of popcorn
   - Dinner: Grilled chicken, brown rice, broccoli
* Drinking over 100 oz of water a day

Some nights I have had salmon and string beans and when I go out I have been making healthier choices (enter grilled chicken salad). I feel better since I have started this two weeks ago, I just wish I could see results! I have been weighing myself every day and on Monday I had lost 2 lbs but now I am back up to what I was last Monday when I started this thing!

I did not write this blog to discourage any of you. I wrote it to motivate myself. I know that I am doing well on this diet and want to push myself to the next level. My next goal is to cut out the Hershey bar and the popcorn. Neither of those things do I really need, it has just been a struggle for me to get rid of sweets entirely! Stay tuned because I plan to update as much as possible. Oh...and this is my official "before" picture. Even though its technically over a month old (May 14).

"Low Platelets, take me first"

After my last blog post, I decided to share the two rare diagnoses I have and how I have been dealing with them...the first is idiopathic thrombocytopenic purpura - ITP.

It was the fall of my sophomore year in college. I was unable to get the meningitis vaccine as a freshman because there was a drought in NC. So the sophomores were told they had to get the vaccine by a certain time to stay in school. I don't hate needles, it wasn't a big deal, went to SHS (Student Health Services) and was done in a flash.

About a week later, I was sitting in my room getting ready for my next class, and my nose started bleeding. I had had nose bleeds before so it didn't shock me. Until I couldn't stop the bleeding. Two hours and an ice pack on my nose later it stopped. So I thought all was fine.

I started noticing the bruising shortly there after. The one I noticed the most was a huge black bruise on the inside of my leg, but I am clumsy so again I didn't think anything was wrong. 

Until I went home for the weekend for a friends wedding. Getting dressed in front of my mom (a nurse), her jaw dropped. I was covered in bruises. When she asked where I got them, I was honest when I answered "I don't know". She took me to her office to draw some blood and sent me back to school on Sunday.

Tuesday I get a phone call from her and she told me that my platelets were 13,000. Normal is 140,000-400,000. Still not panicking because really, what does that mean to a 19 year old? I went about my daily life and had an appointment with a hematologist in Roanoke Rapids that Friday.

On the way home, a tire tread fell off the 18-wheeler in front of us. My grandfather had to swerve to miss it....I joked and said "I am going to write on my arm, low platelets, take me first, if we crash". 

At the doctors office I found out that my platelets were now 2,000. Which is the lowest the machine will read, I probably had less. The doctor said that I would be admitted to the hospital that day, and I started to cry. He said "Don't be scared we are going to take good care of you". I said, "I am not scared, I am not going!! I have an organic chemistry test on Monday". He said "Fine, I can't make you go. But if you go back to Chapel Hill today, you will not live until Monday. Your brain will most likely bleed and you will die".  I also told him about the tire tread, he said "You wouldn't have made it". Talk about a harsh reality!! 

At the hospital, I was given all sorts of tests, including a bone marrow aspiration to test for leukemia. Of course I showed off, saying I wouldn't sign the consent. But I did and the test was negative for leukemia. After all the tests were negative, I was diagnosed with ITP, an autoimmune disorder where my body attacks my platelets. I was given MASSIVE amounts of steroids and couldn't take a shower because I was a fall risk!! I was allowed to leave the hospital at 10,000 platelets, and released to go back to school at 100,000. 

Extremely long story short, ITP is probably something I have always had. The meningitis vaccine just set it off.  I was on a high dose of steroids for 6 months and gained 75 lbs. I was very depressed because of the weight and the mood swings the steroids gave me. But once I got off those I returned back to normal and my platelets stayed at a normal level. I am followed by a hematologist once a year. I am no longer allowed to have any vaccines because of the fear that the viruses (whether live or dead) will effect my body negatively. 

It definitely was a trying thing to go through at 19 but I am glad to say I have had no more drops in platelets since that time!! :) 

My Fitness Journey

I can't even begin to tell you how many times I have started to write this blog, and deleted everything I wrote. But this time it is going to stick. This time I am going to do it!

I also debated about how much back story I was going to give. I decided on the short version. Since I have been an adult (age 18 - now), I have fluctuated between a size 2 and a size 14. The size 2 was when I was very sick with GI problems and was diagnosed with Gastroparesis and the 14 was when I was sick with idiopathic thrombocytopenic purpura and was on steroids. There may be a blog post about both of those times later.

But now I am a healthy, happy 31 year old woman who has gained 12 lbs and 2 sizes since she got married. I know, to outsiders, I do not look big at all. I know that most people will tell me that I do not have a problem. But I do. I have very unhealthy habits. I love my husband dearly, but I have allowed his unhealthy eating habits influence my decisions. He brings home cookies, candies, ice cream, and brownies - and I have been eating it right along with him. And until recently, had stopped working out. I want to be able to fit into clothes I wore a year ago. I want to like what I see in the mirror. And when I get pregnant, I want to have a healthy foundation for my baby to grown on...

So I started slow...

I began my workout routine (steadily) about 3 weeks ago. Since then, I have run/jogged/walked every weekday morning (we have a gym at work, there really is no excuse). But I have kept eating like there is no tomorrow. But Sunday I decided it was time for a change. I purchased large packs of chicken breasts, brocoli, and brown rice and began my meal prep like I did before I got married. My sister is joining me too (who has gained weight for the exact same reasons I have...) and we will be healthy by the time she leaves this summer.

This is going to be a total lifestyle change for me. I can't go back to what I was doing before, because it was getting out of control (as was my weight). It is going to mean giving up a lot of things I love (pizza, chocolate, my sleep in the mornings), but it going to be so worth it in the end. So check back with me weekly (I will try to remember to post) and join along if you want...or provide encouragement if you have gotten healthy or even have always been healthy!

Putting it down on a blog post has made me really excited for the journey...lets do this!! :)

What is your favorite PIECE OF CLOTHING, ACTOR, ACTRESS, and SINGER?

Piece of Clothing

My authentic cowboy boots from Nashville, TN. They are so comfy, stylish, and every time I wear them I think of that amazing trip!!

Actor

Tom Hanks - there is not a movie of his that I don't like!

Actress

Reese Witherspoon

Singer

Johnny Cash - The Man in Black. He is the last person on my concert bucket list. And you best believe when I get to heaven I will be looking for him and ask him to sing "Jackson" with me! :)